Things I Did Not Buy: Things I Actually DID Buy (For a Change) Edition

Well, now! Since I gracefully ended my shopping ban, I’ve had the opportunity to make a few purchases. As such, this edition of Things I Did Not Buy is hilariously misnamed. Never mind that, though. Let’s see here…


Okay, so this isn’t the exact two-layer gold triangle necklace that I bought, but it’s the closest equivalent I could find. This particular necklace is thirty times more expensive than the one I got–and relatedly, you probably can’t find this one at a thrift store in San Francisco. But they both have two layers, they both have triangles, they’re both trendy. Close enough for horseshoes, I say! (I have never actually said that.)


I forget how I ended up there, but the other day I was poking around the internet and found my way to Poshmark, which basically appears to be eBay with comments? Anyway, this cute dress popped up, and as you can probably guess, the awesome colors had me immediately doing grabby-hands. I checked things out and it seemed legit (and the price was right), so we’ll see in a week or two whether I actually get the dress or just a box of spiders in the mail.


On the opposite end of the spectrum, I’ve been admiring Ragini’s gold oxfords for eons, and finally made the decision to go over to Goldenponies and place an order. My gray cheapo oxfords are looking a bit worse for wear, and why NOT have a pair of gold shoes?


Finally, we have a t-shirt with a goat on it. See, an awesome farmer and goat-breeder I follow on Twitter was in need of a little financial assistance so that one of her dogs could get surgery, so she set up a Teespring campaign. (It’s since ended, but you can still give!) I’ll always help a doggie out when I can, and since I am way more aware of dairy goats than I was before I started following her, this shirt speaks nothing more than the truth. Plus, it has a goat on it.

Any new purchases in your neck of the woods?

Outfit Post: 4/5/14


Dress and jacket: Thrifted — Leggings: Target — Boots: eBay (Steve Madden Troopas) — Camisole: Old Navy — Earrings: Nervous System


On Saturday, I was planning on doing some chores and finishing my taxes, but a well-timed text message convinced me to put on a ridiculous dress and go out to a friend’s engagement party instead.


The taxes would still be there later, after all. (And, in fact, they are. Gotta get on that.)


And so I attended a very rousing fete, where we discussed exploding lakes and ate pizza with potatoes and watched other people get fairly drunk!


And I got to wish my friend well, which made me happy. Congratulations, ya old so-and-sos!

Outfit Post: 5/3/13


Dress: eShakti — Sandals: Goodwill (Aerosoles) — Hat: Gift from Leah — Necklace: Gift — Earrings: Hand-me-down — Ring: Target


What can I say? On Friday we had a hat contest at work in honor of the upcoming Derby, so of course I had to wear this one.


It is still, and will probably always be, my most favorite hat–not only because it’s so damn beautiful but because it was handmade for me by a dear friend, so I think of her every time I put it on.


Alas, my hat and I didn’t win the contest–we didn’t even place, losing out to hats with intentionally garish ribbon and one with toy horses glued to the brim. That’s okay, though, we still had fun.


Here’s where I confess that I’ve never actually watched the Kentucky Derby, or any other horse race, for that matter. In college I did spend a lot of time thinking about what I’d name a racehorse if I had one, which is obviously the best part.


At the time I favored an inventive vulgarity–Fuckpickled Thundercunt–which was coined by an internet friend for unrelated purposes, but now I’m not so sure. They probably wouldn’t allow it. What are the rules of racehorse naming, anyway? I know a little about show dog naming but nothing about horses.


Either way, this year’s Derby winner, Orb, seems like a waste of good naming potential. Maybe I’d name my horse Fancy Damn Hat and be done with it.

Outfit Post: 3/1/13


Dress: Won in Dressopotamia giveaway — Tights: Goodwill (Target) — Heels: Swapped (Naturalizer) — Bracelet: Gift — Earrings: Vendor on campus


Allow me to introduce you all to Bluey. You may remember Bluey from Dressopotamia; Elise saw fit to award Bluey unto me last year, and since then I haven’t featured it on this blog at all because I’m a jerk.


(Or, for an alternate reading, Bluey’s cut and Disney-princess sheen make it tough to dress down for the average workday, and I don’t go to a whole lot of swanky parties.)


However! My dear friend and compatriot Tito invited me to see her sing Handel’s Samson with her choir at UC Berkeley on Friday night, and who was I to resist the call of dressing up?


As for the concert, it was a cool experience, even if it came with a series of misadventures involving timeliness on my part. But I made it about a minute and a half before things got going, and I didn’t get a parking ticket, and that’s really all that matters.

Team Outfit Post: 11/21/12

Back in May, Mike and I gave Tia and Braden a wedding present–you know, as you do when you like someone and want them to be happy or whatever. Anyway, our gift to them was a gift card to Home Bistro, because we’re good friends! But the gift card came with the stipulation that they couldn’t go until we came to visit Chicago again in six months, because we’re also jerks. Jerks who like good food.

And lo, those six months came to pass, and Tia and I did dress up all fancy for our shmancy dinner! She nabbed her black, white, and green dress at the swap on Saturday, and I borrowed the purple faux-wrap dress from her closet, because I did not bring anything suitably dressy. (Unless you count giraffe knee-highs as dressy.)

We make a lovely prom couple, don’t we?

It makes Tia want to siiiiiing~

Did I mention that we both snagged bomb-ass shoes at the swap too? Tia’s rad (and generous) friend Abby brought some kicks that no longer fit her, and I happily scooped up these Naturalizers. They were her wedding shoes, too! I promise to love them and feed them and walk them every day.

And Tia brought home these babies, which actually make her as tall as me when I’m barefoot. How novel!

After getting finely kitted-out, we went and had our ets. And ohhhh myyyyy godddddd, the ets, they were good. The night was a prix fixe where we each got to choose three courses from the menu–I could list each and every delicious thing that we had, but suffice to say that there were sweetbreads, there were lamb meatballs, there was poached pear in champagne with mascarpone.

Say it with me now: [unintelligible drooling noises].

In the spirit of food-lovers everywhere, Happy Thanksgiving, y’all! And Happy Regular Thursday, non-Americans!

Outfit Post: 9/7/12

Dress: Macy’s — Shawl: Vintage — Heels: Goodwill (Seychelles) — Tights: Spanx — Bracelet and earrings: Gifts

Who wore all the sparkles on her birthday? Me, me, I did! I wore all the sparkles on my birthday! Just ‘cuz I felt like it.

I knew for months that I wanted to try wearing my old senior-year prom dress again for my 24th birthday, but the shawl-wrap-thing here was something of a last-minute addition when I realized that going to San Francisco for a night out in just a spaghetti-strap dress was probably a poor logistical choice.

Enter the shawl, which was generously bestowed upon me a couple of years ago by an aunt; previously it had belonged to a female friend of my great-uncle’s, or someone like that, and it is from the 1920s and covered in thousands of little sparkly beads! I was, of course, immediately terrified that I would ruin it and it spent the next two years tucked away in my closet, until I realized that leaving it alone in the dark was just sad, and busted it out for a birthday romp. A few beads fell off over the course of the night, but really, I think the old girl had a fine time on the town.

I did feel pretty smashing even without the shawl, though. Mike wasn’t crazy about my outfit–he isn’t a sparkles-and-high-heels kinda guy, and he actually tried to talk me into wearing Bluey (which had arrived in the mail just that day courtesy of Dressopotamia!) as an alternative, but I wasn’t having it. No, it was prom dress or nothing at all! And since nobody wanted me to get naked-birthday-arrested, he acquiesced.

Bluey might have been a more practical choice, actually. The outer sheer layer masks it pretty well, but the inner green layer is shooooooort. Like, I had to try and discreetly pull it down every couple of blocks to make sure my ass was covered. That kinda short. And the drapey neckline is pretty much perfectly designed for a nip-slip (which is also where the shawl came in). But hey, I wore it and I felt cute and nobody slut-shamed me! We’re all winners.

And I’m a double-winner because I thrift-scored these Seychelles babies at Goodwill a month or two ago and took them for a stroll–they’re lovely! Higher than most heels I own, but wicked cool, and the shape of the heel gives me Feelings. Plus, I managed to walk at least two miles in them before I had to admit defeat and throw on my much-loved Born flats. We’ll be seeing you again, Seychelles!

Mike, Tito, and I ran around San Francisco getting glitter all over everything (well, okay, that was mostly me) and having fun. We ended up getting dinner at Lefty O’Doul’s, and Mike and I got into an unresolved argument about whether or not it was better than Tommy’s Joynt, which is our usual spot for large slabs of meat. (Later, when I was telling my mom about the trip, she told me about the last time she went to Lefty O’Doul’s, many years ago, when she and her brothers all got tongue sandwiches. Tongue no longer seems to be on the menu, but the corned beef is pretty good.)

After dinner we did some window-shopping at stores firmly out of our price range (damn you, Fluevog!), took these here pictures, and finally made our way back to the theater, because the play was about to start!

So, War Horse: beautiful light design, mind-bendingly beautiful puppets. The goose was like Michael in another life. The actress playing Emilie was really dang cute, and really, all the performances were excellent (with extra cheers going to the goose puppeteer). I got really, really into some parts (pull the cart, Joey!) but other scenes left me curiously unmoved (DAMN THIS WAR!), which I attribute partially to the uneven script, which was too on-the-nose at times. We know war is terrible, we’re seeing it onstage, you don’t need to say the words. Some moments fell flat because of the stylized way in which they were portrayed; we’re not supposed to laugh at Captain Nicholls’ death, are we?

On the other hand: near the end, when Joey the horse’s fate is uncertain and the man lowers his pistol and takes aim, the entire audience fell silent except for one girl, bless her heart, sitting a row or two away from us, who gasped, “oh my god” with such feeling and seriousness that I can only hope the actors heard it all the way down on the stage. I’ll never know, because I was too busy cracking up.

So was War Horse worth seeing? Well, I’m not gonna say neighhhh!

(I’m sorry. I’ll show myself out.)